Introvert

I was planning on finishing a sewing project tonight, but after realizing I couldn't tell one side of the fabric from the other, I decided I better call it quits, for a seamstress without her wits about her may accidentally turn a dress into a pillowcase.  Better to mess up a blog (and subsequently lose any respect I may have had) than destroy expensive fabric.  That's my motto.

I've been thinking a lot about personality lately, particularly when it comes to the personalities of my kiddos.  Sometimes it's easier than others to get their personalities to mesh, but when all a teacher has is one classroom to keep them in, creative measures have to be taken to make sure everyone gets along.  I'm lamenting some students in particular today-- why can't we all just get along?  On the bright side, they didn't break out into any Apache knife fights today, so I guess I can consider today a successful one.

I realize that most of my classroom squabbles stem from misunderstanding and personality diversity.  All of my students are, basically, looking at the same thing, but each is seeing something completely different.  When it comes to most group tasks, my heart especially goes out to my little introverts.  Poor things....  We'll talk about their predicaments later.

In college I found that one of my favorite areas to study was Personality Psychology.  I clocked a lot of hours researching personality types based on age, gender, culture, birth order (oldest, middle, youngest), etc.  Interesting stuff, it is.  My favorite personality test is the Myers-Briggs test (MBTI).  In a nutshell, a person is rated on four aspect of how they perceive the world and react to it.  If you've got a few minutes to kill, you can take the test here:  http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp

I'm an INFJ personality, which is, according to research, the personality possessed by only 1% of the population....  and Adam Sandler.  Here's a little about what my personality type says about me (and I actually agree):  http://www.personalitypage.com/INFJ.html

I highly encourage anyone to take the MBTI and Google their personality type.  It's fun, unless you're the type who would doesn't think it's fun.  If you're that type, it wouldn't be fun for you.

ANYWAY, let's focus back on the INFJ thing.  The "I" stands for "introvert," and I am the poster-girl for introversion.  I can SO relate to those students who dread the words "group work."  I dread those words too.

The more I'm forced to live in the outside world, the more I realize how ill-equipped some are at dealing with a true introvert, SO (drum roll, please) here's a list to help you, just in case you're one of those people who doesn't know how to handle being around an introvert:

Things Introverts Like

1. spending time alone
2. spending time with others but not having to talk much-- just sitting in each others' company is fine
3. reading
4. writing (obviously)
5. creating things
6. expressing themselves through music
7. expressing themselves through art
8. nature
9. having meaningful conversations with family and close friends
10. working by themselves

Things Introverts Hate

1. asking for help
2. small talk
3. having to talk when they're deep in thought
4. group projects
5. surprise parties... any parties, really
6. having to share information about themselves with strangers
7. developing friendships quickly
8. spending extensive lengths of time with others
9. running into acquaintances at the store (see number 2 above)
10. when others tell them they need to be more extroverted

I understand that, to a natural extrovert, that I might seem grumpy, irresponsible, cowardly, and shy.  That isn't the case, though.  I'm not grumpy, I just don't attach easily to others.  I only reveal myself to my deepest and truest family and friends, and only after having trusted them for a long time.  Speaking only out of formality is a burden.  Even a hearty, "Good morning!" to co-workers as I walk into school each day takes a lot out of me.  Morning time is my best thinking time, and I hate to have my thinking interrupted by socially acceptable chatter.

I'm not irresponsible either, only one who needs time and space to work through problems internally before taking action:  Just because I don't answer questions or respond to comments immediately doesn't mean I'm ignoring them.  It means I'm truly taking them to heart and pondering appropriate actions to take.  When I don't have time to ponder over my responses, even in conversation, I'll feel flustered.  There have been many-a-time when I've said something I don't mean, or I've said things in an unintended manner, only because I wasn't given sufficient time to consider my response.

I'm not cowardly or shy, in spite of what others might think.  Personally, I can speak, sing, and/or perform in front of dozens, 100s, even 1000s of people without batting an eye.  I find that kind of communication more as expression than conversation.  I view my teaching in the same way.  It's deep and meaningful.  However, ask me to communicate directly with one or two people who I hardly know, and I won't have much to say.  I like to listen, and I only like to talk when I have something important to say.

I know that, generally, we live in a extrovert's world, and I do my best to fit in.  However, I know that if an extrovert could glimpse into the world that I see inside myself, they might begin to understand the complexity of an introvert's world.  So, please, be kind to your introvert friends.